something that I have recently realized about myself(as in I realized this driving home tonight): I have always only wanted what I couldn't have. Always. As long as I have been alive on this beautiful planet.
If I am ever told not to do something or that I can't have something, whatever it is automatically becomes 10x more appealing to me. Example: every boy in my entire life that I have ever "liked". Unnatainable on some level. Beginning with Chris Truesdale from Dreamstreet and my cousin. haha... those were the days. I don't know why this is true, but it's always just been part of me to like what or who I couldn't have. Maybe I do it so that I wouldn't get hurt and don't have to be vulnerable. Or maybe it's some psychological scar that runs deeper. But the second (almost literally?) that one of those boys asked me out or I got one of those unattainable objects I would do one of two things. I would either lose all interest, or I would flip out. Or both, one after the other. I know that that is immature. But it's true. And incase you are wondering, if I do this to keep myself from getting hurt, it doesn't work. Don't try it. It's painful to want something or someone who you can't have. Saying this specifically regarding men, I think the man I marry will be a man that I can have and still want any ways. That will stand as my test. If you ask me out, we date for a month, and I still want to talk to you and be around you. You're golden!
That sounds so lame. But it's true.
Good luck hooking me Mr. Right!
No comments:
Post a Comment