I got a Formspring! Hopefully this won't turn out like Twitter... I got one and didn't actually start using it until 9 months later. It's like being pregnant with technology. haha. It takes a while for it to develop as a good and practical/fun thing for me. I guess only time will tell.
I saw To Save A Life again today...! I went with Matt, Lauren, and Tina. It was a good time! The movie is so incredible. Really. It's so realistic that it's upsetting. It's the kind of movie that breaks your heart, and then sets it on fire with hope and motivation. I feel like I'm finally ready for God to put me into a situation where I can help and be a light to others. It's taken me so much breaking and healing and growing to get to this point in my faith, and even my general maturity, I can feel a tug on my heart. I guess I will just have to keep my eyes open. I don't know where or how I can help, but I trust that when the time comes that I will have some way of knowing.
I was looking at my bank statement the other day [I pay for everything with a debit so I can keep track of where my money goes] and I noticed an unfortunate trend. McDonalds, Speedway, Red Robin, Marathon, Thorntons, Wendys, Starbucks, Speedway, McDonalds, Shell. Besides the fact that I spend a ton of money on gas. I eat out alot also. Oops. I've spent atleast $40 on eating out/snacking this month. That is more than a full tank of gas. I could get a full tank of gas and a pair of sunglasses[I love sunglasses. It's a problem]. Not to mention how unhealthy it is, because I mean, it's not like I'm gettings salads when I go to McDonalds... Today after the movie we went to Noodles & Co. [YYYummmmmm] and I didn't get anything. BAM. $5.50 saved. Right there. I just came home and ate mac&cheese instead of buying it. Money saved. Portion controlled. And last Wednesday after CYT@school, I had time to kill before dance but I wasn't going home in between, and I decided before I left for Bartlett that I didn't want to eat out for dinner. So I packed a dinner for myself! I ate salad, an orange, and cheese its instead of fast food. And it felt goooood! So I am making a deal with myself. In effort to strengthen my discipline, grow my bank account, and not strain my clothing. For the next 2 weeks, which is roughly until Valentines Day. I'm going to not spend my money eating out. Just to test it out. It's just not practical now that I need money for important things like gas and shampoo.
Speaking of money... moolah.. dinero... green.. cashola. Whatevs. I don't have barely any. Really. I have an estimated $2 to my name right now. This has put me into a lengthy inner conversation with myself in the past two days. Is money important? This is the question that I keep coming back to. Actually I've always thought about it, but as I'm getting older it's becoming heavier and heavier. I'm sort of puzzling this out as I write it, so bare with me, but I need to figure it out. I think that in the last three sentences I have decided that to me money is necessary and valueable, but not important. Does that make sense? As long as dollars and coins have value in America, money will be important, so it is necessary in order for us to survive... But I don't think that it's exactly important. I need money to pay for insurance, my phone bill, etc. etc. but having any money other than what is needed to do that isn't important to me. It is more important to me to be rich in full and loving relationships, than to be rich in the way of the world. God provides. Always. I've been worrying alot lately about my single digit bank account... But I guess ultimately God will take care of what ever I need, as long as I trust Him to. He will provide the method and the means! haha. Beautiful Savior.
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