Day camp devotionals are not just for kids any more!

I had an epiphany at day camp today. A spiritual one.

I have been struggling recently with what I should be doing this fall. College wise atleast. My options are to go the community route and then try again next year, go massively into debt and go this year, or drop out all together. I’ve been really struggling with the decision and seeking counsel on it a bit. It’s been brought up that where you go to college is not the end of the world, but it is a big decision for me that changes the next year of my life drastically & I’ve been really struggling with the decision and seeking counsel on it a bit.

It was David and Goliath day today for devotionals, all about having faith in God even when the odds are against you. I’ve always had a lot of faith that God will provide what I need no matter what, but the flaw in my faith is reflected in the devotional verse;

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you WHEREVER YOU GO.” (Joshua 1:9)

I live continuously afraid that I am going to make the wrong decision, pick the wrong path, or close the wrong door. As a result, it’s common for me to wait so long that I get shut out. I’m so concerned that I am not doing God’s will, that I actually lose out on some of God’s opportunities for me. I’ve been living in the mindset that YES, God will be with me, but only as long as I always make the right choices. What a scary and doubt filled way to live.

I was talking with a friend last night about this situation and he mentioned that having faith isn’t just believing that God will provide for me, but also believing that He will pick me up when I make the wrong choices. The verse in Joshua says that God will go with me WHEREVER I go, not that He will go with me as long as I make the correct choices all the time. God won’t abandon me if I decide to go to Baylor over MCC, and he won’t abandon me for choosing MCC over Baylor either. He will be there even when it gets hard and I doubt my decision, He will be there if my decision involves me moving across the country, He will even be there if I’m frustrated with having to make responsible choices. How exciting is that? This verse tells me that it’s okay to take a risk, because God is there for me no matter how this whole deal turns out.

I have to decide by tomorrow, and I still don’t know what I’m doing, but I feel so much less anxiety about my decision than I did yesterday. While it’s scary to know I’m taking such a big risk with either decision it’s a relief to know that God always has my back!